God's answers so far...

In my last post I was pondering what my Pastor had preached on last Wednesday. Here's what I have heard from my precious faithful Father thus far. I have a best friend. How did she become my best friend? Time. Lots of time. Sacrificial time. Listening. Being available. Why did I do these things? Because I wanted to know this woman and I wanted her to know me. I pursued her and she pursued me. After a lot of time, listening, and effort we know each other forwards and backwards. That is what I need to do with the Lord. I need to pursue Him. He in turn will pursue me. I need to be available to Him. I need to make a sacrifice of time for Him. I need to read His Word. I need to inhale it's nectar, I need to feast upon it's Words. I need to hide those Words deep in my heart. I need to bask in His presence. I wise woman once said, " Whatever is important to you you will do well." In this case she was speaking about arriving to church on time. She was saying that if church was truly important to me then I will be on time. This has stuck with me for years! If my relationship with God is important to me then you will find me pursuing Him. My question in my last post was, "what is the next level of intimacy with God and what will it take to get me there?" I don't know the next level because I have been neglecting time with The One who will take me to the next level. What will it take to get me there? The sacrifice of my time is what it will take me. He's waiting. It's me that has wandered off, waiting for some holy relationship to just fall upon me without any effort from me at all. So I'm going to read my Bible again. I miss the days when I couldn't find it Sunday morning because I couldn't remember the last place that I read it! I don't want it to be waiting every Sunday morning safely in my church bag. I want roughed up leather binding from lots of handling. It seems so easy. The Lord says," Seek Me and you will find Me." Jeremiah 29:13. My biggest obstacle is unfaithfulness. Sigh, The Lord has His work cut out for Him! But He made me, He knows me, He loves me, and He is waiting for me! There you have it... I'm gonna read my Bible. I'm gonna be with Jesus! I'm gonna seek and I know I'm gonna find! Joyfully, Kathy

Next Step

Pastor asked a question on Wednesday..."What would it take to get you to move to the next level of intimacy with Jesus?" Perfectly legitimate question....one that maybe most could even answer. I, however, sat in my seat dumbfounded. The next level? There was a time in the beginning of my relationship with the Lord when I knew I was drawing closer and my walk was strengthening but now... well now, I just don't know. I'm not living in habitual sin. I go to church. I think for the most part I practice what I believe. On the outside it would appear that I'm living "a good" christian life. But, what is the next level? How do I get there? How do I even begin to advance to the next level? Does that makes sense? I'm not lost but I'm not on fire. I'm (gulp) lukewarm. There I said it. I'm lukewarm and I have no idea how to stay hot all the time? I have know idea what the next level of intimacy with Jesus is and it makes me sad. Almost, makes me wish I had some sin I could give up...not really but you know what I mean! Sigh, this question has been plaguing me for days now and I still have no answers.... hmmm, tomorrow is church! Praise God! Maybe the answer will arrive soon. Jesus, I need to know what the next step for us is in our relationship. I don't want to be lukewarm, You have warned against that in Your Precious Word. I'm waiting for Your answer Lord. Eagerly. Show me Lord. Teach me. I love you, Amen. Joyfully, Kathy

Passion Week

Happy Passion Week to you all! This is the week to reflect and remember Christ love for us as He made His way to the cross to pay the penalty for all of mankinds sin!
Sunday, my children and I were on our way to church, half sleeping, listening to worship music on our local Christian radio station. As I was driving I caught a phrase from a song that I have heard many times but some how I missed this line completely until now. Past Redeemer. Jesus. He is my Past Redeemer. Now this was not something I had ever heard...sure I have heard that Jesus paid the price for my past but the actually words, Past Redeemer, I had never heard. I liked it. It has stuck with me. As I went on through my Sunday the words kept coming to mind. Even today, as I went about my housework, the words were silently being whispered to me. "Past Redeemer." Now I don't know about you but when this happens it is usually because God is wanting to tell me something. This evening I was pondering that phrase when I felt the Lord ask me, " Are you living like your past has been redeemed?" I really couldn't answer that because as that moment I realized that I was uncertain what 'redeemed' really meant. So I got some coffee and sat down at the computer and researched the word.
Redeemed: to buy or pay off, clear by payment, to buy back, to recover, to exchange.

Ok, Wow. The Lord is asking me if I am living like Jesus bought and paid off my past. Like Jesus cleared my past by payment of the cross. That He bought back my past, He recovered it, He exchanged it for glory. For righteouness, for virtue, for cleanliness, for the wearing of white. Am I haunted by the skeletons in my closet. Am I embarressed by what I have been or what I have done in the past. Do I duck my head in shame at the thought of someone knowing where I have been? If I am then I am not living like Jesus has redeemed my past. Im not living like I have a Past Redeemer. My answer is yes. I have ducked, I have dodged, I have allowed Satan to tell me that I'm dirty still, that no matter what I believe I will never be good enough for Heaven. But I am good enough for Heaven because of the magnificant work on the cross. Because my Past Redeemer cleared my name when He allowed Himself to become sin in my place on the cross. What would a life look like that has a Past Redeemer? I see a thankful heart. A person that reaches out to the broken knowing and not judging because they too have been there. We need to not make light of what The Past Redeemer did on the cross. When we continue to walk in shame because is who we were then we are making light of what Jesus did on the cross. When we act as though we have no past that had to be redeemed then we are making light of the work of the cross. If you haven't watched the Passion of the Christ, watch it this week and realize that the work of the cross was anything but light. If you have watched it, watched it again. Be reminded of what your Past Redeemer did for you. He bought my past, He recovered my past, Jesus exchange my past for a future of hope, He cleared my name, He recovered the years that the locust ate (Joel 2:25)! This is something to celebrate! If we are going to lead others to Christ and show them how to be free then we must, I must, live like I'm free! Thank You, Jesus, My Past Redeemer, for redeeming me!

Lovingly composed by,
Kathy

Looking towards the sky!

Lord Jesus, come quickly! When you hear the kind of things that I have heard this week it gets kind of hard not to stray from counting my blessings and just screaming," Jesus, please! Come get us out of here now!" Children being hurt from supposedly God fearing mothers, young men harming their entire family, a huge rise in theft, sexual abuse....there have been many cases this week and last. Being a cop's wife provides me a gigantic view of the ugly in this world. Nothing this far has ever impacted me the way these last incidents have. I'm sickened, brokenhearted... I just want to go home to my Heavenly home! We need to pray and pray hard. Mothers hurting their children is a sure sign that this world is going very much astray! My flesh wants to hide. Hide my children and just never venture out again! BUT I can't do that... as a Christian I have the antidote that this hurt and dying world needs. His name is Jesus! He is not to be hidden, He is to be shared. He is the ONLY hope that this world has! We have been called to join Him in reaching out to others! If we don't share Him, who will. How can others come to know the peace that I have if I don't reach out to others.... Now the cases that I'm speaking about above I'm not so sure that I could have done anything about but what I can do is pray, right now. I can stand in the gap and beseech the Lord on the behalf of others. Let us be reminded that the Lord loves the one who committed the crime as much as He loves the one who was victimized. As hard as that it...pray for those who care committing these cruel acts. Jesus died for them too!

Holding fast to the Lord,
Kathy

Deciding to Rejoice

Oh my heck! This has been a bad Monday. One that I need a rewind buttom for. A let's go to bed by 12 noon and forget that today ever happened!
BUT, I am choosing to count my blessings instead of my sorrows. This isn't an easy decision as it is far more desireous to whine, thank you very much flesh! But I am an overcomer in Christ and I'm dying to my flesh and choosing to enter into His gates with Praising! ENTER:

I'm Blessed....
Jesus Christ saved me
He bought me at a costly price
He has never forsaken
Jesus has never abandoned me
He has forgiven me
He has taken me back
He has rescued me
He has changes me
He has set me free
Jesus unshackled me
He has danced the dance of a lover with me
He sings over me
He listens to me
Jesus prays for me
(We could seriously be on how great Jesus is forever)
I have an amazing husband
He accepts me
Provides for me
Protects me
Loves me
Plays with me
Laughs at my jokes
Is very handsome
Works hard for our family
Works extra so that I can stay at home
He forgives me
(We could have a love fest for days here too :) )
I have two incredible daughters
They love the Lord
They love me
They love spending time with me
They help me bear my burdens
My kids love the Lord
They are living for the Lord
They apologize and let me apologize
They forgive me
They are fun
I get to homeschool
I live in America
I LIVE IN TEXAS
I'm free
I have an awesome church
Have an awesome Pastor and his wife is awesome too
I have a home, a pretty home
I have 4 great dogs
I have a great cat and her 5 babies
I have a fenced in backyard
I have a car
I have food
I have lights
I have running clean water
I can shower every day
I have clothes
I have an awesome mom, dad, brothers, and sister
Oooo I have a cool fish tank
I have the internet
I have a blog
I have amazing friends, especially my Bestie

I could actually go on and on and on but I have accompolished what I set out to do... I am extremly blessed and my blessings far out way my sorrows! That is such a relief! Thank you Jesus for all that You have allowed me to have and have trusted me with!

Joyfully,
Kathy

Praise Him anyway!

So this morning after struggling to decide what to wear to church I finally decided on a orange shirt and khaki skirt with some nice brown boots. I felt like I looked nice...not that that is what going to church is about but being a stay at home mom...I enjoy getting dressed up on Sunday! My girls are taught to bring their best to the Lord's house too. Anyway, as we are sitting at the red light to turn onto the church's street when my COFFEE CUP LID COMES UNSCREWED AND DUMPS THE CONTENTS ENTIRELY ON MY SKIRT!Yes, I know at this point normal people would be thinking about the scalding that my legs took with the coffee spillage but no, ladies, no. I was devasted at the wreck on my skirt! I mean it was drenched!At this point there was no going home..gas prices and we live a good 30 minutes away. Plus, my youngest baby would have to miss out on her Sunday school class. I resigned myself to sitting in the car and listening to worship music for the time that my kiddos were in church. I mean, come on. I couldn't possibly go into church in that condition. What would people say/think? They would stare or feel the need to comment because they were caught staring at my mess. I acutally toyed with the idea of running to the local walmart to get a new skirt...but the budget told me to get other ideas. As I was sitting there in my car, wearing my coffee, I felt the gentle nudge of The Holy One..." You were looking forward to church today are you really gonna let a little spill keep you from my house?" Thinking that apparently God was having a little trouble with His vision today, I pointed out to Him that I was wearing almost an entire cup of coffee. There was no hiding it! But what a persistant God He is..." Praise Me anyway." My response, " Really?" He said, " This is not what church is about. It's not about the right clothes, the right hair. It's not even about you...It's about Me. So, yes, Praise Me anyway." With a renewed love for Sunday worship in God's house I got out of the car and strategically held my sweater in front of me as not to cause too much of a ruckus. When I sat down next to my oldest daughter she said," I'm glad you joined me." I said to her, " Praise Him anyway right?!" Turns out I really needed to hear the message and you aren't going to believe the Scripture that I was led too. Well if you have been enjoying a relationship with God for any length of time this will probably not surprise you one bit. Philippians 4:4 Rejoice at all times. Again, I say, Rejoice! WOW! Then the Lord gently pointed out that that Scripture doesn't have any add ons. No rejoice as long as your aren't wearing coffee, as long as your hair looks good, as long as the kids behave and hubby picks up his laundry. Nope, we are commanded to Rejoice! Rejoice because God is good! Because we are free to go to church, because Jesus saved us...I could go on for days! This morning was a good reality check! I needed to be reminded of why I go to church in the first place and last but not least....it was an awesome teaching time for my girls! Praise God! Happy Sabbath to you all!

Joyfully,
Kathy

New Beginnings and Such

Ever find yourself searching for a "do over" button or a "begin again" button? As one who is forever on the search for the perfect "do over" button I'm especially fond of January! January represents newness, starting over, a fresh start! I love it! It excites me...I love to plan all the new things that I want to get started on! I love the saying, " Out with the old and on with the new"! That spells January to me! Trouble is, I fail shortly after beginning all these great new things. Failure is very disheartening to me. I'm sure I'm not alone in this. So the other day I proudly announced that I haven't failed at my no resolutions making year! My dear friend suggested that we have a goal each month and keep each other accountable for it! I love this! I think I can really succeed at this! I'm going to begin on the small scale and work my way up. I have a great many things that I want to accompolish around our home and I'm excited that I don't have a long resolution list! I'm simply going to make a list of things that I want to accopolish this year and choose one a month! Now, of course there are things in my day to day life that I want to begin implementing and those I'm going to start slowly too. I'm not going to rush into it with several things to start doing differently. I will just get frustrated and quit all together! So there you have it! The newness of this year has me excited and I'm going to begin with purging my 10 yr old's room! ( Shivers in fear)! Have a beautiful day in the Lord!
Just a helpful tidbit: it takes 21 days of doing something over and over to form a habit. I'm thinking I'll start with Bible reading quiet time!

Joyfully,
Kathy